why would people ever want their lives to be a bed of roses?

it's just superficially beautiful. i mean the fact is roses have thorns. so ur life is just pretty, on the outside. but what lies beneath is a whole world of difference.

but then again, how would you ever know another person's life fully? most people dont even know a hundredth of their friends' lives. even ur best fren. at most what? 5%? 10%? everyone has their own dark secrets which no one is able to find out. no matter how many secrets u and ur friend share, there's bound to be one or two, deepest darkest secrets that u'll never know and he'll never tell. so how then can you say you know your friend very well? you only know him as what he makes himself out to be.

how many people in this world are always true to themselves? a miniscule minority. can you say it outright that you've been true to who you are? you've accepted what you are as a person? and you dont go trying to change how people look at you?

i mean all the facades. who are you trying to kid? yeah you can kid the whole world. but at the end of the day, you're only kidding yourself.
but then again, who are you?

you know, interviews this year there was this repeated qn which is would you put up a strong front in front of the band everytime? I've always wanted to hear someone say "no, i cant and i will not force myself to put up a strong front. because i'm human. and not a solid rock wall that can tank all sorts of stuff."

but i never heard that if memory serves me right. people say they can put up and will put up a strong front, after all who likes to see ur top 2 acting like cry babies right? but face it we're all humans, it's more painful seeing someone up there putting on this front when evidently he/she is breaking and crumbling inside, compared to that person just saying that he/she is too stressed out and needs to take a breather.

the scary thing abt always putting on a strong front is that sooner or later, you'll unconsiously do it and at that time, u'll unconsiously reject help from ur close frens because that strong front thing just seeps in everytime and takes control.

this wednesday going to watch SYF PN. there's always this tinge of regret, that i've never been able to lead the band up there on the presentation night stage to perform. never had that exhilarating feeling to be at the back of the esplanade, knowing full well that you've the affirmation that you're one of the top 2 bands in spore.

but still, i'm darn well happy that i got to play for SYF and put in those months of crazy hardcore bullshit trainings :) yep

our time is over, all we can do is hope it continues to be better.

srsly, <3 rjcsb
<3 rimb :)

haha once again a blogpost of incoherent ramblings =)

ciao