there's many things i learnt today. some good some bad. some can be said, some better left slient. but at the end of today, i learnt 2 very important things.

1. The only person you should compare to is yourself.

i took 5mins. thats all i took to figure out that comparing urself to others really won't give you a sense of satisfaction. each person has his own unique abilities, his own flaws, whether or not he beats someone else is totally irrelevant, because only you would know urself whether how well you did that day was a true representation of ur abilities. if you underperformed, it doesn't mean anything except for the fact that you need to ask yourself what went wrong, and if you got a valid reason, there's no need for you to feel sad abt it. because no one is able to remain at peak performance throughout his life.

i make mistakes, i'm just a man.

when you compare to urself, and u outdo urself, i really cant find a better source of satisfaction than this. it's not to prove ur worth to others, but rather to prove ur own worth to urself. there's no way you can be at the top of the world, not unless you know each and everyone of the 5plus billion people in the world and you know the most extreme limits they can go to, otherwise, its impossible to compare urself to others, because there'll always be someone better than you.

this sentence came to me after the concert. after the solo i played and screwed it up badly. i realised that practice doesnt make perfect, but yet not practicing will mean perfection will never be achieved. i practiced both solos hard, and many times i was able to play it perfectly, hitting the high notes with a strong enuf force, i practiced till i got what i wanted, and yet both screwed up on the actual day itself. whos to blame? me. but what i got out of this was a lot more then just screwing up the solo. i learnt that anything can happen, anytime. preparation does not mean you're guaranteed a perfect performance. it just decreases the chances of you screwing up. but not preparing means you have 100% or close to 100% chance of screwing up.

so im glad that i screwed up the solo, for then i know what im not as good as i thought i was and that more practice is required =) but really, thanks to those who said it was a nice solo =)

2. Don't do things which will let others perceive you differently from who you really are.

it's all about maintaining that image. that image that you're a cool/funny/joker/and what have you. i didnt really realise this until today, when i reread that message. it struck something in me. i think sometimes i do try to maintain a certain image in front of certain people. but now i realize that if those people really know you, they would know who you really are and there's no need to put on a facade in front of them, on the other hand, for people who don't know you, well who cares what they think?

my closest friends or those that know me well, can tell by a change in my tone how im feeling. the best being my mom, who can tell by a change in my tone whether im sick, well, happy, sad and whatever emotional or physical state im in.

i resolve to not put on an image for myself from now on. for if you know me/close to me, i believe, you would know what type of a person i am.

im not really sure what type of a person i am myself, but then again, that's for me to know and for you to find out =) no prizes for guessing correctly xD coz it's not meant to be described in words anw =)

well that rounds up thinking for today =) this whole thing took me less then 7mins to think abt. it somehow just *lighted* up in front of me. now that i got it off my head. i got more space for other stuff =)

but then again, not all things are meant to be said on a blog which at least 10 people say everyday haha. had a talk with band people, and hey im not a pimp -.- but ya it is interesting to talk to a whole group of girls and observe the way they communicate. differs a lot when talking to a whole group of boys. sometimes that's the reason why i plant myself in the middle of a group of girls. not to pimp them. i've totally no reason to. -.- but to observe them. quite cool. you guys shld really try it out sometime. and people only call u a pimp based on the fact that you are with a group of girls, not coz you're like actually pimping them which i tink is kinda stupid.

and you know what, there's one more thing i learnt, shall say more tmw or im never going to sleep tonight. and that is to take a step back and look at the things which you never really cared to observe. you'll learn to treasure these things more =) i've been neglecting some things. but then again. that's for tmw =)

for now, leave you all with a song =) and again it's an oldie =)

for you especially =)