sighz, i realize that practice does not equate to perfection. today is a perfect example of it. not many things went well today. heh bball lost, prac was screwed, failed econs, just passed chem.

i mean, i won't say i've practiced like a lot for the solo i've written, but i can safely say that i've thought abt it time and time again after the 1st time was screwed up, practiced in front of the metronome, found out i wrote for 7 instead of 8 bars, changed the notes to try to suit the chords, and now i find that there's mini-details which i kind of don't know because i do not have a musical background. oh oh and i got an ulcer on my lips. wow. wad a good standard to be in 4 days before the concert. man, first time doing such a long solo, ad lib sommore and i'm wtfing myself. sighz. need to prac more, whether it'll help, that depends on the concert day, anything can go, either it'll be very good, or very bad. average somehow just won't fit in. shall prac hard tmw (not as if i've not been pracing hard).

tests, screwd chem and econs, 3 tests all failed. okay i can say that i know for one chem and econs test i didnt study or prepare, so i know i cant expect anything, but for the lecture test, i did prepare a bit, and i was expecting to see more then a 12/25. pass yea, SUB-pass to me = fail. haiz. honestly i was expecting more. nvm shall study hard during the holidays. really. at least i know that i tried my best, real best.

the concert's on monday, i hope my ulcer doesnt become full blown by then. or rather i hope it just goes away now. heh i tink i've developed this innate ability to know whether im on form from the moment i play my first note. today, the first reading said suck, so did the next few. but no, tmw it'll be good. and no matter what, im going to make that damn solo sound nice. yeah, not as pro as jj, but still, shall give it my best shot. concerts at esplanade are hard to come by. especially concerts wif solos inside.

today is a bad day, real bad. but den again, the day is going to end in abt 2hrs 45mins time. bad things will only last at the maximum 24hrs. any longer, it means that i don't know how to look forward and make the best of what i have.

resolution for concert. both solos i play will have to be of standard, any lower is downright unacceptable, but having said that, 3 days doesnt seem to be enough time. shall do my best within these 3 days tho, on that day, i'll leave everything up to fate.


for now, let's go through this bad time together =) for tomorrow will be a brighter day =) let's bury today somewhere, let it be a lesson learnt and we'll create a brighter day tomorrow =) i love you so much =)

For you <3!